fibromyalgia – Page 9 – Jesus is for the Wounded

Pray without ceasing

Published on December 15, 2013December 15, 2013 by Jesus is for the WoundedLeave a comment

¹⁶Rejoice always, ¹⁷pray continually, ¹⁸give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5

The pages of my journal are color coded for quick reference to the various noxious symptoms of this ongoing illness. This system helps when making medical summary documents or answering questions during doctor appointments. It looks like every line has either blue (for headache), green (pain), orange (seizure attacks), purple (nightmares or waking terrors), or red (flu-like sickness) today. Whew! I had planned to write the hairy details directly from my journal for my blog entry today but I think that just mentioning the rainbow of wacky stuff going on is good enough. But don’t worry. I am more stable now. I slept until 5:00 p.m. today with about 1 1/2 hours awake this morning for breakfast and journaling. This is crazy stuff man.

And yet every speck of color and it’s accompanying saga are part of the Lord’s perfect plan for my life. I am sad that Steve has to endure this too. Yet as a believer, to have a wife with a serious illness is part of the Lord’s Divine plan for his life as well. How this works is such a mystery! So for me, if I am to live as Christ then I must take His Words into my heart and allow them to breathe life into my achy body each day. I must pray without ceasing, give thanks for all the goodness that continues all around me, and know that He can use everything for His glory. This is a mighty responsibility. Hope I get it right!

Will this time of illness refine me in some way? Perhaps. I know that in another time of my life, repeated trials softened the harsh edges of my personality. I learned that I have a Heavenly Husband and grew in fellowship with Him. (Oh how I wish every married woman would know the joy of having a perfect partner in life as manifest in the Lord so she could cut her earthly husband some slack a little more often!) I also witnessed the amazing provision of my King in what appeared to me as “upside down and backwards” most of the time. In the end, the pieces of my frazzled life came together perfectly. I even met my knight in shining aluminum (aka the 24-foot box truck that Steve rented to move me from Illinois to Indiana!) who has shown me love like no other person on this earth. The Lord restored the years the locusts had eaten (Joel 2:25) so to speak, and I was set to live happily ever after . . .

When there’s a major turn of events in the life of a believer, chances are there’s also a major opportunity to receive something wonderful that could not come any other way. Who changes his or her personality just because it’s Saturday? No, it usually takes a major train wreck or two for that to happen! Because the Lord has shown me His faithfulness, His heart, and blessings even in heartache, I will continue to choose to lean on Him, wait on Him for all things.

Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the thing which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

These colorful experiences of mine, good and bad are temporary. Thank goodness! Allow me to share with you one more passage that brings this hope home in my heart:

You, who have shown me great and severe troubles, shall revive me again, and bring me up again from the depths of the earth. You hall increase my greatness and comfort me on every side. Also with the lute I will praise You — and your faithfulness, O my God! Psalm 71

We have a Heavenly Father who promises to be with us though all of the trials of our lives and redeem them for eternal glory. Come to His throne of grace with me Gentle Reader and bring before Him all your weariness, hurts and pain. He sees them and carries them with us. And one day they will be washed away when either He comes again for His own or we join Him when our time here is through.

If you do not know Him as Lord and Savior of your life, well, you are missing out on perfect peace and so much more. I pray that you will consider following Jesus as Lord and Savior of your life. If you make that decision today, please contact me and tell me all about it. If you rededicate your love for Him, please tell me that too. After all, to reach others for Christ is the main reason why this blog is here. My time of illness and connecting with you today are part of His perfect plan for my life. They just represent more pretty colors for the threads in the tapestry of my life you might say . . .

Laughing while it’s starting to snow

Published on December 14, 2013 by Jesus is for the Wounded2 Comments

I couldn’t decide which of these was the best so here is all of them. Now take your dose of laughter, the best medicine!

It’s all I have left

Published on December 12, 2013December 12, 2013 by Jesus is for the Wounded2 Comments

I hit another wall today: one that reminded me of my inability to control or think my way out of pretty much anything. Have you been there?

Amassed in noxious symptoms after finally venturing out of the house on my own today, I had thought things were going pretty well earlier. I was becoming sicker so I came home to unpack my stuff from some errands and rest a while before making dinner. Losing the next 3 hours in bed after coming home was not what I expected. After all, I am getting better right? Well I’m not sure just yet.

Sometimes a person just has to stay focused on a moment as small as one breath in time. At least I could breathe this time when the “non-epileptic seizures” hit. Gratefully I had my phone with me and the app for Harvest Fellowship messages would fill my mind with the Word of God. When there was a break in the action I could get it going, listen, and maybe relax. The darkness of my spirit lifted somewhat as Pastor Paul Mowery began to speak. I missed my husband who was away at the midweek church service. To text him to please come home did cross my mind. But then I realized that the One I really needed was already here . . .

I cried out to the Lord and He met me there in that dark bedroom refuge. Our pastor’s words from the Book of John about abiding in the love of Jesus Christ filled me like a cup of warm cocoa running through my veins. Then when the recorded message began with a recounting of the disciples “visibly shaking” as Jesus teaches of His upcoming death, resurrection, and perfect peace I lost it. The seizure-like attacks had already been in a continuous pattern of havoc for over 30 minutes. “Visibly shaking?” Yeah. I get it. Only I am not only afraid. I am sad. I am grieving the loss of so much with this illness. I am broken.

²⁷Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (John 14)

Yesterday I said to a friend on Facebook that the shortest verse in the Bible is John 11:35, “Jesus wept.” The God of the universe was displaying His human compassion for the death of a friend and for the terrible wretchedness that we must endure in our earthly lives. I shared this to encourage her that the Lord sees her pain over the death of friends or their loved ones recently. This verse speaks to me today too. My Lord sees my suffering, so much loss (i.e. time, money, fellowship, activities, health, fitness, and intimacy with my husband), heartache, and weakness. He grieves yet He knows my heart and loves me more than I can ever know. He is not the God of this world so there will be pain and suffering in this world. No one escapes these. Jesus Himself will come again in glory and gather those who know Him to be with Him through all of eternity. When I die I will see Him and be in His glorious presence forever. And while I am still here, I know that He will use all of this for my good and His glory too:

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8)

Right now I don’t feel as bad as I did earlier this evening. It’s very early in the morning and I feel like some things got worked out this evening. It’s as if my Lord and King has me cradled gently in the shadow of His wings and that’s a great place to be for restful sleep. All of the other things that I write about in this blog (my eBook, online jewelry) should never take the focus off of what and Who is most important in my life. Jesus rocks!

Very simply I’ll close with this: I love you Lord Jesus Christ and I want everyone who reads this to know you too. After all, when I do take my last breath it will be all that I have left. Gentle Reader: how about you? JJ

Give the gift of compassion

Published on December 10, 2013December 10, 2013 by Jesus is for the WoundedLeave a comment

Know someone battling a serious illness and want to give them a meaningful and encouraging gift this Christmas? Give the gift of compassion and a copy of

Hope Beyond Lyme: The First Year

Now available from Smashwords.com and Amazon.com!

Now it’s available in 9 different formats so you don’t even need an eReading device to download your copy for just $2.99! To learn more go to: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/371334 and be sure to click the “Give as a gift” link from any book page. Smashwords will email it to your loved one immediately upon purchase. If you would like it to be a surprise instead be sure to put your own email address where indicated, print it out when the order is complete and hand it to the person, well personally!

For Amazon Kindle shoppers, head to: http://www.amazon.com/Hope-Beyond-Lyme-First-Year-ebook/dp/B00G9WF1RK/ref=la_B00GAOAOI8_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1386631580&sr=1-1

Discover from a fellow sojourner, my most meaningful and encouraging moments to share vignettes of understanding with your loved one battling a serious illness. There is hope and with faith in God, we will find the true meaning and source of that hope.

Thank you, Gentle Reader, for helping to make this project possible! Just Julie

So much to say, so few words

Published on December 6, 2013December 6, 2013 by Jesus is for the Wounded2 Comments

Taking a cross country trip this past week when weak was an optimistic undertaking. Of course there were trials and ongoing mayhem. And in the midst of it all, there were unexpected blessings too.

Relax, I won’t go on here with a long blah, blah, blog about our recent 3000 mile journey from Indiana to Texas and back! I’m sure it will unfold in the days and blogs to come. Let’s just say that overall, the dog had a great time! She played in the wide open spaces of my sister and brother- in-law’s 5 acre ranch teasing the Golden Retriever, taunting the snarls of the old Chocolate Lab, and skirting the advancement of Armani (the spirited mare and companion of Buddy, pictured below). Our pup Elle looks depressed at home alone today. I must say that I understand completely.

Today begins the first day of a new treatment regime for a serious systemic infection. As you can see by the time of this writing, I have avoided my second dose for a few hours now. Sish. I’m such a weenie sometimes. But hey, can you blame me? After 2 years of promising treatment approaches and wretched responses to virtually all of them, I am less than brave anymore. So in a few words as promised: I’m leaning on the Lord today, grateful for surviving 8 days away from home with some precious memories as a bonus, and slowly getting all of the laundry done. The rest of the last bag of Beanitos chips is well on its way to my tummy as I say goodbye to one of my few remaining treats to prepare for Candida warfare. From here and for at least the next month, I’m hitting this beast head-on. The first few days are usually the hardest. So what: it’s time you met your match you fungus among us!

My spiritual preparation comes from the words of the apostle Paul in 2 Timothy 4. My prayers are for merciful endurance, victory, strength for my husband, and glory to The King:

⁶For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time for my departure is near. ⁷I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. ⁸Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.

Seeya when I can. Take care all, Just Julie