It’s all I can do

Focusing on breathing today.  It’s all I can do.  The stress level is high as Steve and I anticipate travelling out of State to see my brother tomorrow.  Gratefully I report that it appears he is stabilizing after having had a severe stroke this past weekend.  My own struggles with illness and daily seizure-like episodes continues.  A new treatment for me didn’t pan out too well, increasing the severity of the post-treatment episode.  Oh well.  The Lord goes before me and all of us as we call upon His mighty name:  Abba Father!

Lord I need you now.

We got this.  Philippians 4:13

 

I submit Mike's left-sided weakness to the Lord who strengthens us all.
I submit Mike’s left-sided weakness to the Lord who strengthens us all.

 

 

My Top 10 List: Tools of the Trade

Top 10 List

I had a supervisor one time that said, “you are only as good as your tools.”  She was referring to the splinting supplies in the occupational therapy clinic that included state-of-the-art warming trays.  Thermoplastics used in making upper extremity splints must be heated to the correct temperature or they become gummy; they also might burn your patient’s forearm when it gets too hot!  They had a thermometer on the splinting cart which was a luxury in those days.  Now with so many choices of materials from which to choose at a variety of temperature specs, having the right tools is standard practice.

Splinting never was my forte but the advice stuck with me.  My words came back to me when the men in my life would often repeat this phrase when faced with a decision of whether or not to add to the man cave “tool box!”  Yeah, it was usually o.k. with me.  Usually a new kitchen gadget jumped into the shopping cart too.  🙂  These days my tools relate more to gardening and my own health care.  Here’s a new spin on the latter:  your recovery is only as good as the tools you employ for recovery.  This post is an addendum to an earlier blog entitled, Keeping Sane While Recovering from Serious Illness.  With some tools that are tongue-in-cheek and not necessarily in this order, here goes:

1)  Treatment journal, online or in a notebook.  Keeping track of medications, supplements, medical appointments, changes in treatment plan, etc. is critical to success.  Who wants to make the same mistake twice?  My hand-written journal entries are more truncated these days since I’ve got my routine stuff down better and more social supports in place.  I do go back to earlier postings and am grateful for some progress.  Even if I am not doing better in other areas, I know that I am coping better overall; thank you Lord!

2)  Smart phone.  When stuck in bed I can still stay connected to the outside world via my social media favs, email, and text.  The Bible App is awesome and keeps me in the Word on a daily basis with its Bible-in-a-Year reading program.  On my mobile I can also look up what the heck is going on in my body and boost my lame brain with reminders of this or that on my calendar.  I was a late-adapter to the world of 4G+ and cannot see going back to a flip phone anytime soon!

3)  Fingertip less gloves.  My hands and extremities get chilled in the evening.  It’s a battle trying to do a few things when I am awake and feeling better in the middle of the night but feel like I’m freezing!  The drop in body temp can trigger noxious symptoms so I needed to find a strategy for keeping my hands warm.  I was Christmas shopping at Macy’s this past year and there they were in a colorful display:  a table filled with mittens that had removable mitts so you could expose your fingertips.  Your hands stay warm from the middle knuckles through the wrists.  Success!  These even come in handy when taking frozen foods out of the freezer or grocery shopping.  Grocery stores give me the chills year round.  Know what I mean?

4)  A really warm fleece jacket with pockets.  For the reasons noted above, I finally have something to keep me warm when roaming about the house later in the evening.  The softness of the fabric is comforting too.  What did we ever do before Polartec?  Or maybe for you it is a handheld fan?

5)  Fuzzy socks!  Yes they are warm.  It’s the cute designs and fun colors that make me smile a little when my feet are cold.  My cow socks (which were a gift from when my Aunt Patty lived in Vermont) are my favorite.  The thicker the better, over the ankle, and loose-fitting too.  Such a simple pleasure.

6)  Breakfast from a traditional lunch bag.  Mornings are the hardest for me.  Most days I awaken in elevated pain with noxious symptoms that make it difficult to use the bathroom let alone make breakfast.  Finally the Lord led me to a solution of making my breakfast the night before much like I used to make my lunch to take to work each day.  The freezer pack keeps it cold until morning.  Many times I am eating food cold that others might microwave/heat up before mealtime but that is not a requirement for me anymore.  I just gotta get food in my belly to feel better so a chunk of meatloaf for breakfast it is sometimes!

7)  Making the effort to cook or purchase special snack foods that fit within my restricted diet.  For example, I think I’ve finally mastered coconut flour pumpkin (or squash) muffins to comply with my Candida/mold-free/low oxalate diet.  Pulling a little essence of home-baked goodness out of my breakfast bag in the morning with Earth Balance Organic Coconut Spread, I no longer feel deprived!  The recipe is a bit challenging so I double it and freeze them for yummy goodness each morning.

8)  Emergency remedies on hand at all times.  For me this includes high CBD hemp oil and a charcoal-filter face mask that have arrested an oncoming seizure attack when in a public place more than once.  We need to be proactive in managing the crises of our health condition where possible, saving the real emergencies for situations beyond our control, eh?

9)  Slip-on shoes and slippers.  Who wants to bend over and risk falling on one’s head when weak from illness and needing to cover one’s feet?  Yeah, not me either.

10)  Something or someone warm and fuzzy.  Yes, this can include the stuffed kind or your man with generous amounts of chest hair to comfort us when needed.  (O.k. maybe your lady in soft flannel pajamas would apply here instead!)  When my beloved is not home our German Shepherd pup gets a little extra massaging.  Who knew that a big, protective dog breed would love to cuddle?  Elle, you rock.

Well there you have it:  my top 10 list of recovery tools.  Have some of your own?  I’d love to hear about them!  Please feel free to add your comments below.

No Whining!

Let's make that, "whine."
Let’s make that, “whine.”

Getting there, slow but sure

That’s something my Grandma L used to say when we asked her how she was doing.  It didn’t matter if she was in the hospital recovering from a bout of shingles or adjusting to a new living situation:  she had an upbeat disposition that covered anything that wasn’t quite right in her world.

Below are a couple of treats to share with you as I slowly venture back into making macramé and leather jewelry.  This hobby is a great creative outlet and another way to connect with others when someone fancies an item from my online jewelry shop:  Trinity Jewelry by Design.  Take a look and find some new and cute wrap-style bracelets with new beaded leather bracelets on their way soon!  Click on the images for more information on each item.  :J

Handmade Boho Macramé Wrap Bracelet
Handmade Boho Macramé Wrap Bracelet
Every Day is Valentines Day Macramé Wrap Bracelet
Every Day is Valentines Day Macramé Wrap Bracelet

Into the night

The sun has gone down over the drifts of snow blanketing our neighborhood.  It’s (-1.7) degrees F outside, continuing the snowiest and coldest record-setting weather in our corner of the Midwest.  The German shepherd pup doesn’t seem to mind that the snow in most places is deeper than her ears; she hops like a bunny at breakneck speed to catch up with us on foot or on skiis in the backyard anyways!

All is quiet now before Steve comes home from work.  He’ll arrive within the next 30-minutes and rush about unloading his car, taking care of the pup, washing his workout clothes, and the like.  Then comes the best part:  a sweet kiss for his beloved, sitting here waiting, waiting.  But for what am I really waiting?

In this Hillsong Music piece from 2010, we feel the timeless yearning of the songwriter as he runs into the arms of his beloved:  the Lord, Jesus Christ.  It is a love song for sure.  The sojourner anticipates the embrace of the only One who can bring true goodness, joy, peace, truth, and light to a darkened world or situation.  My favorite part includes the words in bold:

You are more, You are more
Than my words will ever say
You are Lord, You are Lord
All creation will proclaim
You are here, You are here
In Your presence I’m made whole
You are God, You are God
Of all else I’m letting go.

Oh, I’m running to Your arms
I’m running to Your arms
The riches of Your love
Will always be enough
Nothing compares to Your embrace
Light of the world forever reign.

Into the night there are wretched seizure attacks waiting for me, every night for the last 8 months and every day for about the last 2 years.  Last night turned ugly with convulsions and spontaneous vocalizations that appeared demonic at times.  Steve rescued me sitting frozen at the edge of the bed then faced yet another late work night praying over me, warming my frigid frame.  How much can a couple of broken souls endure?  As believers we understand the answer:  with Jesus, “all of it.”  I’m here typing at the computer as proof.  Sure makes me afraid to go to bed each night since an encore is usually waiting for me as my head hits the pillow.  And you wonder why I stay up so late?  Number one I am wide-awake about an hour after an episode ends, and number two I guess I’m trying to delay the inevitable.  With prayers in-hand I go to bed.  Eventually the noxious symptoms let go to a measure of sleep.

Tonight I will feel presence of the Lord in the love of my Steve.  Tonight in my heart I will fill the empty places he cannot reach with the love of my Lord.  After all there are places that only God can reach and fill, places He designed only for Himself.  I have no idea how anyone would endure continuing heartache without knowing Him.  Nothing else satisfies so completely.

But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find him if you seek him with all your heart and with all your soul.  (Deuteronomy 4:29)

You are my strength, I sing praise to you; you, God are my fortress, my God on whom I can rely.  (Psalm 59:17)

Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken (emphasis added).  (Psalm 55:22)

So here is some simple encouragement for you this evening, Gentle Reader.   Perhaps I am living proof that yet the righteous be shaken (only made right by the blood of Jesus), we can run with praise to the God of all creation who longs to fill the heart and soul with that for which it longs within us.  It may look bad for a time.  Gratefully, “time” won’t last forever though.  ;j

Click on image to link to: Forever (He) Reign