16 Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5
The pages of my journal are color coded for quick reference to the various noxious symptoms of this ongoing illness. This system helps when making medical summary documents or answering questions during doctor appointments. It looks like every line has either blue (for headache), green (pain), orange (seizure attacks), purple (nightmares or waking terrors), or red (flu-like sickness) today. Whew! I had planned to write the hairy details directly from my journal for my blog entry today but I think that just mentioning the rainbow of wacky stuff going on is good enough. But don’t worry. I am more stable now. I slept until 5:00 p.m. today with about 1 1/2 hours awake this morning for breakfast and journaling. This is crazy stuff man.
And yet every speck of color and it’s accompanying saga are part of the Lord’s perfect plan for my life. I am sad that Steve has to endure this too. Yet as a believer, to have a wife with a serious illness is part of the Lord’s Divine plan for his life as well. How this works is such a mystery! So for me, if I am to live as Christ then I must take His Words into my heart and allow them to breathe life into my achy body each day. I must pray without ceasing, give thanks for all the goodness that continues all around me, and know that He can use everything for His glory. This is a mighty responsibility. Hope I get it right!
Will this time of illness refine me in some way? Perhaps. I know that in another time of my life, repeated trials softened the harsh edges of my personality. I learned that I have a Heavenly Husband and grew in fellowship with Him. (Oh how I wish every married woman would know the joy of having a perfect partner in life as manifest in the Lord so she could cut her earthly husband some slack a little more often!) I also witnessed the amazing provision of my King in what appeared to me as “upside down and backwards” most of the time. In the end, the pieces of my frazzled life came together perfectly. I even met my knight in shining aluminum (aka the 24-foot box truck that Steve rented to move me from Illinois to Indiana!) who has shown me love like no other person on this earth. The Lord restored the years the locusts had eaten (Joel 2:25) so to speak, and I was set to live happily ever after . . .
When there’s a major turn of events in the life of a believer, chances are there’s also a major opportunity to receive something wonderful that could not come any other way. Who changes his or her personality just because it’s Saturday? No, it usually takes a major train wreck or two for that to happen! Because the Lord has shown me His faithfulness, His heart, and blessings even in heartache, I will continue to choose to lean on Him, wait on Him for all things.
Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the thing which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
These colorful experiences of mine, good and bad are temporary. Thank goodness! Allow me to share with you one more passage that brings this hope home in my heart:
You, who have shown me great and severe troubles, shall revive me again, and bring me up again from the depths of the earth. You hall increase my greatness and comfort me on every side. Also with the lute I will praise You — and your faithfulness, O my God! Psalm 71
We have a Heavenly Father who promises to be with us though all of the trials of our lives and redeem them for eternal glory. Come to His throne of grace with me Gentle Reader and bring before Him all your weariness, hurts and pain. He sees them and carries them with us. And one day they will be washed away when either He comes again for His own or we join Him when our time here is through.
Matisse Tree of Life
If you do not know Him as Lord and Savior of your life, well, you are missing out on perfect peace and so much more. I pray that you will consider following Jesus as Lord and Savior of your life. If you make that decision today, please contact me and tell me all about it. If you rededicate your love for Him, please tell me that too. After all, to reach others for Christ is the main reason why this blog is here. My time of illness and connecting with you today are part of His perfect plan for my life. They just represent more pretty colors for the threads in the tapestry of my life you might say . . .
This past year proved to be another wild ride at our home, filled with adventures both good and, well, the other one!
Steve discontinued his Winter Shooting League commitments to be home with his beloved wife early in the New Year. Two Fort Wayne event planning committees benefitted from Steve’s expertise running canoe and kayak racing competitions, held this summer. His kayak racing (K-1 Unlimited) went well again for his fifth year racing in the U. S. Canoe Association circuit here in northern Indiana. Participation in the USCA national meeting as a delegate and a respectable finish in the USCA Nationals were additional highlights this past year. And while threats of layoffs continued at Exelis (formerly ITT), the Lord preserved Steve’s work again; it appears that the engineering contracts will continue for the next three years. Yes!
Steve’s leadership and dedication to the Lord played out in continued work on the Missions Board at Harvest Fellowship in addition to weekly Bible and worship services. I appreciated the weekly gift of a CD of the pastor’s message as my worship became more homebound due to the older conditions of our church building. While I dreadfully missed the fellowship of our church home, I am grateful for the uplifting Bible teaching and first-hand account of all-things-Harvest when Steve came home with his play-by-play Sunday updates!
The biggest adventure of the year was the remediation of our home for mold between January and March. We had just returned from seeing family and friends in Georgia, Florida, and South Carolina in January when it became clear that there were mold spores throughout the house that were causing significant compromises of Julie’s health. After extensive testing and prayer, we discovered that mold had developed in the air return area underneath a bathroom cabinet. Julie stayed in a hotel for 76 days, most of them with our dog Elle while Steve ran back and forth between home/hotel/work. Steve’s daughter, Christina, was finishing a furlough with us before returning to Thailand this Spring. I thanked her for coordinating some of the clean-up efforts and navigating the flooring replacement project that included the entire house. To say it was a major undertaking for all of us would be putting it lightly! We are grateful for the Lord’s provision and guidance . . . and to be back home! We are home except for Christina that is: she is pursuing her work in linguistics and as an Intern Coordinator in Thailand.
Quick update: Patrick and Kate celebrated Jackson Rees’ first birthday this past September at their home in North Carolina. We unfortunately were unable to attend due to my illness but wait with great expectation for their return visit to Fort Wayne this Christmas. Rebekah is now finishing her first semester at Vanderbilt University in Nashville; international education will be the focus of her Master’s degree. And Daniel continues to thrive as a Corporal in the Marines, based down the coast from Patrick in North Carolina. We are delighted to host him and his girlfriend, Elizabeth Posey, for some Christmas celebrations here real soon.
And for me, well check my blah, blah, blog for the hairy details! (www.justjuliewrites.com) I continue to battle the complications of a serious illness. Recent new treatments are providing promising results and I must say that we see the hand of God guiding me and Steve through this often difficult journey – with some moments of sweet tenderness that probably could not have come any other way. I am also grateful for two projects: my online jewelry business (www.trinityjewelrybydesign.com) & eBook (https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/371334) that have kept me sane when tempted to feel discouraged. There is hope and I see it every day in the face of my Jesus and heart of my beloved Steve.
So we hope that you will be encouraged this Christmas: the Creator King is on the throne and is ready for us to celebrate His birth in just a few days. The love and hope of Jesus Christ makes the difference to hearts and minds surrendered to His care. He does it for us. How about you?
If you can’t have peace when sick in bed on a drop dead gorgeous afternoon . . . your God is not big enough.
When the dog looks at you with worried eyes because she heard you yelping from the bedroom with convulsions and you wonder if you’ll survive the day . . . your God is not big enough.
A doctor gives you a new medication to calm you down and maybe even lessen your suffering, it doesn’t, and you wonder if you’ll ever get past the wretchedness, the repeated disappointments . . . and your God is not yet big enough.
When you are frustrated that dinner is finished after midnight, you are up on the internet after 2:00 a.m. and you lose faith that you will ever have a normal life . . . your God is not big enough.
If every day poses a new test to your resolve and there is none left . . . you have not learned to rely on a God that is big enough.
When your blog glorifies your own accomplishments, makes you appear stronger than you really are, and claims to know anything separate from the One who made you . . . you have not allowed your God to be big enough.
And if you can find a way to convey how small yet how loved you really are, how your forgiveness spans as far as the east is from the west, and how there truly is hope beyond Lyme disease or what you can see . . . your God is becoming big enough to believe.
So if you are suffering in any way like me and find yourself in doubt, in pain, despairing, angry, lonely, or worse, it’s time we both face the fact there is a God who is big enough to carry all of our burdens. Let us come before His throne of grace this day and pour out our hearts to the One whose gracious thoughts towards us outnumber the grains of sand on the earth. He wept for each one of us, He sweat drops of blood for all of His children, He died a tortuous death for you and me, and He rose from the dead to save us from the burdens of all of our troubles in this life. In time, He will come again for you and for me to live with Him forever in paradise.
As you ponder this, I invite you to get to know just a little more: the God who is big enough. And if you have not yet invited Him into your heart, consider doing so this day too. You will see what a difference His love will make. Then you will say about the Lord Jesus Christ, His Word, His hope, His promises, the adventurous and mysterious life that he bestows upon us: I just can’t get enough!
Jesus is for the Wounded 
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