So much to say, so few words

Taking a cross country trip this past week when weak was an optimistic undertaking.  Of course there were trials and ongoing mayhem.  And in the midst of it all, there were unexpected blessings too.

Relax, I won’t go on here with a long blah, blah, blog about our recent 3000 mile journey from Indiana to Texas and back!  I’m sure it will unfold in the days and blogs to come.  Let’s just say that overall, the dog had a great time!  She played in the wide open spaces of my sister and brother- in-law’s 5 acre ranch teasing the Golden Retriever, taunting the snarls of the old Chocolate Lab, and skirting the advancement of Armani (the spirited mare and companion of Buddy, pictured below).   Our pup Elle looks depressed at home alone today.  I must say that I understand completely.

Today begins the first day of a new treatment regime for a serious systemic infection.  As you can see by the time of this writing, I have avoided my second dose for a few hours now.  Sish.  I’m such a weenie sometimes.  But hey, can you blame me?  After 2 years of promising treatment approaches and wretched responses to virtually all of them, I am less than brave anymore.  So in a few words as promised:  I’m leaning on the Lord today, grateful for surviving 8 days away from home with some precious memories as a bonus, and slowly getting all of the laundry done.  The rest of the last bag of Beanitos chips is well on its way to my tummy as I say goodbye to one of my few remaining treats to prepare for Candida warfare.  From here and for at least the next month, I’m hitting this beast head-on.  The first few days are usually the hardest.  So what:  it’s time you met your match you fungus among us!

My spiritual preparation comes from the words of the apostle Paul in 2 Timothy 4.  My prayers are for merciful endurance, victory, strength for my husband, and glory to The King:

For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time for my departure is near. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.

Seeya when I can.  Take care all, Just Julie

Steve and Julie with Buddy
Steve and Julie with Buddy

Between a rock and a hard place

headache back pain comicSometimes you have to make a choice.  You are at a dead end or maybe lost.  Perhaps what worked in the past will no longer suffice.  Or perhaps you are facing the most difficult reason:  an external force requires you to act immediately.  Regardless, the process goes more gently when covered in prayer to the One who sees you and your situation, cares for you, knows your heart and heartache, and has a plan an purpose for your life.  That plan and purpose includes the crossroads in which you find yourself.  Stepping forward into the arms of the loving and perfect Father through a relationship with His son, Jesus Christ, will carry you through the decision every time.  He already knows, sees . . .

Gratefully I don’t have to stress very long these days before I’m at the throne of grace with my alms of concern.  I understand that it blesses the Lord to come before Him with all things big and small; such a mystery of His amazing grace.  This week had them both for me.

Big decision:  sell the Beam Ray/Rife machine in which Steve and I invested so much hope and resources just 1-1/2 years ago.  It’s not working for me and I cannot tolerate most of the frequencies anymore.  Time to let it go and move on.

Small decision:  relinquish my cheaper cell phone with a slider keyboard for a smartphone.  We will benefit from having it on the road when travelling and it will expand my online business possibilities.  Time to let go and move forward.

Big decision:  place active Lyme and mold treatments on hold to eradicate a serious systemic yeast infection.  This requires risking more noxious events to kill the fungus that is hurting me and may even be contributing to the seizure attacks, etc.  I seek wisdom in the timing of all of this with the upcoming Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays.  Alas, it is time to let go of the time table and move ahead carefully.

Small decision:  discontinue the IV magnesium treatments at number 28 because the symptomatic “cost-benefit analysis” don’t compute anymore.  Sometimes you simply have to choose.

Medium decision:  sold my (beginning) surf ski kayak called a Stellar SR.  This one brought tears.  This illness has challenged my fitness and balance skills making the mastery of paddling this specialty kayak quite difficult.  Steve just sold a kayak as well so we likely will invest in a solo outrigger canoe and share it.  These are awesomely cool, fast paddling boats that just might work with either kayak or canoe paddles.  Yeah but I let go of the SR before ever mastering it.  I got sick after paddling it October 11, 2011:  my third time on the water with it.  Seeing it go on a rainy afternoon was a gray reminder of the past 2 years of illness and brought up feelings of failure.  Sish, maybe this was a bigger decision than I thought.  The tears are making it hard to see the computer screen right now . . .

I think tomorrow will be a retreat day.  Steve and I will be celebrating our wedding anniversary and perhaps something simple will be nice this time.  One of the best decisions of my life was to move out of State to marry Steve 6 years ago.  Ahhh my intended beloved.  How the Lord has blessed me with a man after His own heart as you!  However we choose to spend our time together, I am sure that it will be wonderful.

O.k. so I just went from tears to blushing.  Allow me to send you off with a prayer:

Heavenly Father, thank you for seeing and hearing the hearts of Your children each day.  Help us to reach for the shadow of Your wings to carry us when we cannot stand, to shelter us when we must wait on your Divine hand in our lives, to lift us when it is time to step out in faith once again.  If it is Your will I ask for healing for me from this complicated mix of illness and for the Gentle Reader finding you this day whilst reading this blog.  Cover us with Your healing grace and merciful love.  Guide us in our decisions for your glory Lord.  And help us to keep our eyes fixed on You, waiting with great expectation for Your Providence to unfold.  I love you Lord.  In Jesus’ name, amen.

Rambling thoughts saving this day

What could have continued as a wretched day, did not.  For this I am grateful.

When my course of overall treatment seemed to need a brand new direction in a far away place, I discovered it did not, gratefully.

Where I thought I would be two years down this road trip of illness is not where I had hoped and it’s o.k.; I thank the Lord for His continuing grace.

Who ever thought I would be connecting with so many different people in so many far away places?  Not I and I am blessed for things going this way instead.

Why I spend so much time setting goals when the moment is far more worthy of my attention, I’ll never know.  I am thankful for the fullness of living in the now and not yesterday or tomorrow.  This minute is all we have to live in anyways, right?

How I ever thought I would find something meaningful to say tonight eluded me when I first started typing.  I hope these are Your words, my Heavenly Father, my King, my Lord.  I hope they bring you glory and honor this night and with each and every blog that spits out onto this page.

So with a humble heart I must say that I am confused as to where my life is going yet not Who is in control of it’s course or outcome.  My mind is mushy as I recover from a tough night with:  a few scrambled brain transmissions, an enlightening visit from my Lyme-Literate MD, and a week of wacky medical appointments for sure.  There’s so much other stuff to do this weekend yet I have too depleted of energy reserves to much of anything.  Guess I’ll start with breakfast when I wake up in the middle of the day and take it from there, one moment at a time.  Some important things did get done this past week; I am humbled.  Thank you Lord for making it so.

The conclusion might read like the 12th Step of Recovery in Al Anon:  Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.  Well here’s my message tonight and I’m working on “walking the talk” as they say too.  However the best inspiration, the best encouragement won’t come from me or a recovery program (that ultimately helped lead me to a personal relationship with God).  It comes directly from His Word:

You, who have shown me great and severe troubles, Shall revive me again, And bring me up again from the depths of the earth.  You shall increase my greatness And comfort me on every side.  Also with the lute I will praise You – And your faithfulness, O my God!  (Psalm 71:20-22)

Perhaps if we meditate on these words we will no only save the day, we will find hope, love, and joy in His promise of redeeming grace.  This is a promise for you, Gentle Reader, if your trust is in the Son of God alone.  Oh won’t you join me in seeking Him this day my friend?  Let our words, our thoughts mean more than rambling but resound with praise for His holy name, the name Jesus Christ.  What could be more significant than when we place our trust where the One who loves us beyond measure gives us every reason why to follow Him?  These are things to think about for sure.  :J

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Reflecting on God’s majestic Niagra Falls, Canada

Free Coupon Ends Soon!

Just a quick note that the free coupon for the eBook, Hope Beyond Lyme:  The First Year, ends on Saturday.  If you’re interested an updated collection of my most meaningful and encouraging blogs plus several Bonus Pages, head on over via the link below.  It’s available in 10 different formats, including a new smartphone app from Dropbox.

Final few days that it's free with Coupon Code:  UR45T
Final few days that it’s free with Coupon Code: UR45T

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/371334

Here’s a little video with a personal invitation from me too:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=opCttpUCZW0

Take care Gentle Reader and thank you for your support this past year online.  I am grateful to the Lord and humbled knowing you are there . . .

Just Julie

Oh so pretty!

Thought I would post some updates from my latest creative endeavors.  It’s taken over a year to develop my creative style of macramé jewelry: a hobby that has helped keep me sane in addition to my new eBook.  Here are some pics to share where I’ve landed with my new macramé wrap bracelets, and more.  If you would like more information, click on the “Etsy” square in the right hand column or follow this link:  Trinity Jewelry by Design.  Enjoy!  Just JulieDSCF9056

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