The Old Makes Way for the New

Phillipians 4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

A broken vessel could be a metaphor for my life these 1 1/2 years.  Then again, I could just start from today, praise the Lord for His enduring Spirit, mercy and grace, then move on!  Since today is a new day, I’ll choose the latter.

Besides, if you look closer, you’ll see the buds on the branches of the lilac bush emerging from the broken vase below.  Can you see them?  They are the signs of new life that can come with each new day.  Noting that I cut these branches to increase the flower production on the plant adds additional meaning:  sometimes our lives must be pruned to free us for the blessings to come either in this life or the next.

For those in Christ Jesus, we know that he will work all things together for good (Romans 8:28).  We can trust him in the times of new growth, the times of pruning, the times of brokenness and the times of loss all the same.  Wow.  So glad I learned this when my life totally changed 10 years ago. Well I mean that it took 10 years to understand the transforming power of the gospel, working in the lives of His friends, His children, His people.  The Lord’s love and care is working in me too.

My hubby says that I should use a plastic vase instead of a glass one outside.  Yeah, he’s right.  Glad this episode of brokenness  is an easy one to fix!  I’ll let go of the vase, fill another with the waters of life and embrace the newness that is growing all around me.  (Reference:  see the second picture please!)

Hmmmmmm, I think there’s something growing inside me too.  Little by little, the illness I have is transforming as well.  Praise the Lord!  :J

DSCF7726DSCF7731

‘Twas the Night Before Moving

Sung in my heart this night to the tune of “Twas the Night Before Christmas” by Don Williams

‘Twas the night before moving

And all through the hotel room,

Not a creature was stirring

The dog smelling rank, for lack of da groom.

The clothing all packed

By the door with other stuff,

In hopes that the cleaning

At home would soon be enough!

The couple will nestle at last

All safe in their own bed

While visions of dollar signs

Will forever dance in their heads.

And the contractor is gone

Who took care of the rug

He can finally settle down

For a long Spring evening’s, er, nap.

When out in the lawn

Tomorrow shall bring such a clatter

As Julie drags in boxes-n-bags

To create an end to the matter.

Away to the window

No longer cracked to air out the mold

We’ll put back together the place

Steve and Julie once again will call home.

The moon on the breast
Of the new fallen snow
Gave the lustre
Of midday
To object below.

(Just love the imagery of the original poem as the snow melts one last time this season.)

When what to my wandering eyes

Should unexpectedly appear

A check from USAA

To cover some of the new gear!

Away to the window

I’ll fly like a flash,

To see my Spring bulbs a popping

Alas not the hotel staff, smoking their midday stash.

With a little tear of happy

So lively and quick

I’ll know in a moment

No longer in my home will I be quite as sick.

More rapid than eagles

My heart begins to swell for my Lord

As I whistle and shout,

“Praise be to the Lord!”

Now Dashing Stevers,

Dancing Christine

Prancing Sonny,

On Comet Dale J.,

Cupid Stevers (again of course)

On Donder Stay Inn staff

An blitzen bloggies out there:

To the top
Of the porch
To the top
Of the wall
Now dash-away
Dash-away
Dash-away all.

****

Let us spring a new song
To His sleigh, to His throne,
Give worry a whistle to go away
The Lord’s sleighdom flies for you & me alone.

“But wait,” I hear Him exclaim
As He lifts me to my next place,
“Happy Wednesday to all
And to all a goodnight.”

And then the dog threw up

Elle's Bone
Elle’s Bone

It’s all over now.  The Lord sustained us through another crazier than imaginable 24 hours.  If all things work together for good for those who love the Lord and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28), then all is well in this moment.

From Steve’s side:  he worked all day yesterday, drove to our home (undergoing mold/dust restoration), moved furniture, gathered a few things from Julie’s short list, ran his clothes through the dryer (to remove the noxious dust), showered, then drove back to the hotel room to meet his bride around 12:30 a.m.  Dinner was waiting and so was elusive sleep . . .

From Julie’s side:  I had endured days of noxious neuromuscular events (aka “herxing”) as a side effect of a new round of antibiotics, completed a medical appointment and Lyme treatment, arranged for the furnace to be cleaned in the hotel room, made dinner, and tried to get myself to sleep after making/cleaning up from dinner.  Seizure attacks interrupted my sleep and woke up Steve a few times as well, unfortunately.  I felt terrible for him!  Headaches and a myriad of yucky symptoms returned for me and I was unable to get up and take an Epsom salt bath to help mitigate the symptoms.  By 4:15 a.m. I was too numbed out too be bummed.  Perhaps that’s grace, I suppose.

The alarm went off to attempt to wake me from whatever sleep had transpired.  Steve turned it off and I drifted off to sleep for a moment until the sound of our dog gasping then heaving awakened both of us.  Yuck!  I dragged her into the bathroom just in time for the lamb bone from yesterday to make it’s reappearance.  Well, we were both out of bed by this time!  Happy Wednesday.

Steve decided to go into work a little late today and went back to bed.  As for me, the dentist appointment was a disaster.  This is recovery from Lyme Disease on a bad day.  It ain’t for wimps!  Even the maximum amount of nitrous oxide was not enough to prevent re-triggering seizure attacks as the procedure began.  The dentist and hygienist were gracious in employing every coping strategy we could muster to get me through it; the warmed water in a syringe for rinsing and the blue “blanky” helped some.  What was to be two procedures in two hours turned out to be one procedure in three hours plus 10 minutes on straight oxygen, 30 minutes in the lobby, and 30 minutes in my vehicle in the parking lot.  Whew.  I guess that I’m just on a different time table that’s all?

I do believe the NIKKEN Kenkotherm comforter with advanced magnetic technology is calling me for a nap about now.  I’m on a new antibiotic and I feel more stable.  Thank you Lord for my coconut yogurt treat when I got back to the room. And I love the feel of my warm puppy at my feet as I’m writing this to you from the hotel lobby.  The staff is so nice here.

********************************************************************

Nope.  Still not “there yet.”  Just endured another temporary setback that’s all.  Still haven’t arrived at “the station” noted in the Part 2 blog and may never fully “get there.”  This moment is good.  It’s all I have anyways.

You know, I think I need some chips too.  :J

Are we there yet? Part 1

When the going gets tough, many gals go buy shoes.  Today I think my response will be to go buy dog food and printer cartridges.  Geez!  I gotta get a life, eh?

My husband says that our current living situation (living in a hotel while we remedy my allergy to our home) reads like the childrens’ book Fortunately, Unfortunately.  In the book, fortunately a character gets to fly in a plane but unfortunately, the plane starts to crash.  Fortunately the passenger has a parachute but unfortunately it won’t open, and so on.  Yeah, this is the story of my life of late:

Fortunately, Steve had plans to go to Florida for a United States Canoe Association meeting in January but unfortunately he had to cancel due to the severity of complications of my battle with Lyme Disease.

Fortunately, I got energized after praying with our doctor and discovered I could have a few more food items but unfortunately he told me not to drive and I needed to go to the grocery store to get those items.

Fortunately, after Steve’s daughter, Christina, drove me home, I had started to feel better so I took a risk and drove myself to the store.  Unfortunately I was too weak to walk well and had to hang onto the grocery cart to make it through the store and back to my truck, my home.

Fortunately,  by this time I had figured out that I could stay in the house without seizure attacks and neurological collapses if I kept the windows open but unfortunately it was 20 degrees outside.  So I turned up the furnace and dragged my way through cooking enough food to sustain my special diet a few days on the road.   We had just cancelled a trip then reinstated it just hours before leaving town for over a week.

F:  within 48 hours of leaving town I was 25% better from all symptoms!  U:  The home we first stayed at had a history of water damage and mold, continuing my risk for exposure, noxious symptoms, and difficulty sleeping.  But the recovery process was now underway!

F:  within 3 days, I was 65% better as we continued to travel.  By Friday, I was grateful to be able to kayak in our two-man outrigger  canoe with my Aunt Lori on a bayou off the Gulf of Mexico!  From dying to living once again!  U:  it rained our last full day there and I had a resurgence in symptoms sleeping in the room with the windows open.  F:  the couch in the living room was next to a closed window and I was able to sleep about 2 hours.

F:  we were able to continue our trip to see some friends at their log cabin in the woods of South Carolina for some sweet fellowship and wild boar cuisine.  Hog is a menu item in my special diet and SC is the capital of hog hunters’ heaven, so to speak.  U:  fog rolled in the second night and kicked up the mold spores in the sleeping winter landscape triggering another setback.  Oh well.  We had a great visit anyways and I got another hour of sleep after we closed the windows, again.

F:  I was able to reserve a hotel room back in the Fort Wayne, Indiana area so my beloved could drop me off in a clean environment for our first two nights home.  This would give us some time to figure out a temporary living situation for me while we began the process of mold remediation in our home.  U:  I didn’t get to be with Steve again overnight until three days later.  He would begin commuting back and forth from home to the hotel, transporting needed items back and forth, taking care of the dog, visiting Christina (before she left town for 3 weeks) and so on.  Fatigue set in for him; stress began to mount for both of us.

F:  some dear friends offered me a lovely room-with-private-bath and generous kitchen privileges so I moved in.  U:  I had a few hours to kill in the afternoon between the time when a CPR class ended and they would be home.  All my earthly possessions to carry me through this time was in the bed of my truck or king cab.  The outside temperature was zero.  I simply couldn’t get warm and had no where to go.  I was beyond exhaustion, frustration, exasperation.   I went to a coffee shop to warm part of me then the library to use the computer and kill some time, cry a little.

F:  The lady of the house I was to move into called and offered an earlier time to move in and I was delighted!  This couple provided a place for me to stay 5 years ago when I was dating Steve; so many happy memories from that time.  U:  as soon as I saw them, instead of relief, I began to cry and could not stop.  The stress of my nomad life and uncertain future overwhelmed me.  Their love provided the safe place to let it all out . . .

F:  I had the best nap ever soon after I moved in.  U:  at 4:30 the next morning I had low grade seizure attacks that would not cease.  I got up and prepared a snack and sat at the kitchen table for awhile, hoping our friends would wake up and help me sort this out.  What went wrong?  We never really figured it out.  They had successfully resolved a water damage situation 9-10 years earlier and had “iron bacteria” in their water.  What was going on?

F:  since I had not reacted to the hotel, I made a reservation and went back for 2 more days of respite.  U x 2:  the room temperature vacillated, finally dipping to 58 degrees on a frigid winter night.  The maintenance guy was gracious to attempt a repair however a wire fried when he tested the system spewing smoke into the room.  F:  we were able to open the windows to air out the room and he brought a space heater to warm up part of the room.  U x 2:  the smoke smell was never fully eliminated and I woke up with marked seizure attacks at 2:00 a.m.   We called the office and relocated to another room just to sleep, in sub-zero weather.  More attacks followed in the freshly cleaned, highly chemically-scented room.  What now?

F:  a sweet family and friends offered for me to stay with them.  I packed up again and divided myself between various available spaces in the home for my luggage, food, supplements, and so on.  I had definitely gotten my routine down by now, made dinner and enjoyed visiting with them and their daughter.  She is such a cutie and playing with her was a great distraction from the events of late.  U:  seizure attacks returned as I awakened the next morning.  Guess I wasn’t meant to sleep in my cocoon in the gun room after all.  But I just couldn’t bear to move again.  Tried sleeping on the couch the next night and it didn’t go so well.  My hips hurt so badly I had difficulty walking.  Sigh.  I really enjoyed staying with them!

F x 2:  The very first room I’d stayed at in the hotel (where I did fine) was available so I moved back the next afternoon.  Some dear friends gave us a generous gift to help cover some of the hotel expenses, taking off the time-pressure, stabilizing my situation, so we could start focusing on remediating the house.  U:  almost every time a large item, number of items, or new smell was introduced into the studio room of the hotel, I would have a setback.  Multiple chemical sensitivity had set in and limits the progress.

F:  By this point I’D HAD A 60-HOUR INTERVAL, 72-HOUR INTERVAL, 60-HOUR INTERVAL, AND A FEW 48- HOUR INTERVALS without severe symptoms to date.  Praise the Lord for these, His provision, some sweet times in the hotel room with my “married man” and reuniting with my dog whom we brought to the room as well.  Puppy therapy rocks!  The healing process can also be rocky.  It is now here!

Stay tuned for Part 2:  The Fortunately, Unfortunately story of our home remediation.  This too has been a rocky process with some sweet possibilities as I write this.  Without my faith in Christ, I would be lost right now.  As it turns out, I’ve been displaced due to extreme circumstances twice before in my life.  I have seen the Lord, “restore the years the locusts have eaten.”  (Joel 2:25)  I will choose to “trust the Lord and lean not on my own understanding” for the promise that “he will direct (my) paths.”  (Proverbs 3:5-6)  I will, “press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Pillippians 3:14)

Someone once said that life is either a wild ride or nothing at all.  I think I’ve got one of those kinds of lives!  And we aren’t even “there yet.”  Hang on with me, k?  :J

Do we love the Lord a little?

Little-Girl-Dreaming-of-the-World--56003This article is from Dave McCarrell and the February 13th issue of PGM News, a non-copyrighted newsletter of Pacific Garden Mission in Chicago, Illinois

“Little by little, some Christians are growing a “Little” careless.  On Sunday mornings they sleep a Little late, and come to church a Little tardy.  Some doze a Little, listen a Little to the sermon and give a Little in the offering.  After dismissal, they argue a Little, gossip a Little, and go home and forget what Little they heard, and act a Little as if they care Little for the greatest, grandest, holiest, and most precious privilege on the earth — that of worshiping and serving the Lord Jesus Christ.

I may have exaggerated a Little, but very Little, and in some things I may have omitted a Little, “O ye of Little faith” (Matt. 6:30, 8:26, and 16:8).  ” . . . thou has been faithful in a very Little . . .” (Luke 19:17).  “Yet a Little while and that shall come, will come and will not tarry” (Heb. 10:37).

Little-by-Little, we can improve a Little by putting forth a Little effort in seeking to overcome a Little evil.  Little evils do not remain Little.  So a Little thought given to Little things may produce a Little improvement in a Little time.”

After reading the above by an unnamed author, I was challenged by the thougt of the many Little things I let distract me from the important things God has for me.  I am sure all of you, if honest would say the same thing.  Then I was challenged by the ultimate question that our Lord asked Peter, and the question we as believers all must respond to:  “Peter do you love me more than these things?”  (See John 21)15-17)

Instead of these things, in our case, I believe God is asking us:  “Do you love Me more than the Little things you have brought into your life?  Examples could be sports, TV, movies, material possessions, homes, cars, questionable friends, etc.  What a great opportunity to examin what Little things are keeping us from experiencing God’s best for us.

“JUST JULIE’S” ADDENDUM:  Thank you Lord for this reminder that You are not only Lord over all things big and little, You care about all of the things in our lives, big and little.  I can trust You with every detail of my life.  Yup, every one.  I lay my cares at the foot of Your throne of grace for your tender care.  You know what they are and in that fact, I rest this day.  Love,  Julie