Humor Gets Crazy on a Sick Day

Today is a sick day.

Don’t expect too much from me today.  Guess I overdid it grocery shopping until midnight last night?

Oh well.

And now for some crazy humor.

6 pack abs

Step-Saving Cooking and Kitchen Tips

Since I have to cook a lot these days while recovering from a chronic illness, I measure every ounce of energy almost as much as every ingredient that goes into each special recipe.  Then again, most of my recipes are hybrid anyways so the “measuring” is with a pinch or scoop of this or that substituted for that or this!

Tis a good thing that I came into this time of illness as an occupational therapist.  I used to teach my patients about energy conservation and work simplification during activities of daily living.  Those terms translate to saving time and energy doing everyday activities.  So allow me to share a few tips that go beyond the Extreme Dietary Makeover Strategies documented earlier.  Those strategies related more to the recipes; these tips relate to the tasks of working in the kitchen including cooking.

Setting up the Kitchen

Keep seasonings that you use often in a cute container by the stove or main food prep area.  For me this contains white pepper, celtic sea salt, marjoram, onion & garlic powders, etc.  The rest are put away in the spice cabinet!

Keep small appliances, water filter devices, and main serving dishes setting out on the counter or within reach when possible.  For example, my favorite pottery bowl in which I eat most meals is on top of the microwave.  Inside the bowl is a matching small plate that I use to serve my supplements and keep them from rolling off the counter and table!  They were made by a favorite potter too, making things a little more special and pretty.

Everything is placed within the “work triangle” between the frig/stove/sink to save steps gathering items, cooking, and cleaning up the kitchen.  This area includes all of the fragrance-free cleaning products, paper towels, trash can, etc. needed in the kitchen.

I only have one dispenser on the kitchen sink and it contains dish soap.  This works well for cleaning hands and dishes when it’s a milder or fragrance-free soap.  This also saves time and money dealing with multiple kinds of soaps and dispensers.  I just refill the dispenser when needed from a larger, economy-sized bottle.

Use paper towels as napkins!  After I made the change, I saved time and money every week that I would have spent re-filling the napkin holder.  Pull out the paper napkins for entertaining.

Use a low-lint towel for drying fruit/veggies to save paper towels or the time spent cleaning a salad spinner.  Or, use paper towels to dry fruit/veggies and let them dry on the side of the sink.  The damp paper towel is then handy when reused for spills, spot cleaning.

The most often used items in a kitchen, from utensils to drinking glasses, should be in the easiest to reach shelves, cabinets, and drawers.  Does the junk drawer really need to be in your work triangle in place of the silverware drawer, eh?

Place heavier serving and cooking dishes in places that you can access without hurting yourself or your joints!  This might mean keeping your favorite cooking skillet that you might use most days, on the stove, ready for use.

My motto for organization is:  the more I can see, the less I have to dig for stuff.  So there are lots of wire shelves and organizer devices in our pantry and upright freezer.

Make sure that there is adequate task lighting over the area where you are using knives, measuring foods, reading labels, etc.  A simple battery-operated light fixture from your local hardware store that has a press-on switch can reduce fatigue, injuries, errors.  Industrial double-stick tape or Velcro adhesive will allow you to put it where you need it without special tools for installation.

Keep supplements and medications taken at mealtimes within reach and within view of the kitchen table where possible as a reminder and step-saver.  Using an attractive basket or tray for each family member keeps things tidy and organized.

If there’s not already a calendar, grocery list, list of emergency-and-commonly-used phone numbers posted in the work triangle, and home phone (or cell phone charging station) consider adding them.

When bringing frozen foods home from the grocery store, reserve a plastic grocery bag or two to help organize items before placing them in the freezer or refrigerator.  For example, bag up all of the packages of ground beef in one bag and loosely knot it with the plastic handles.  Be sure that you can read the package label through the bag or label it with a permanent marker.  When you are ready to use the ground beef it will all be in one place to find it easily in the freezer and of a quantity to provide plenty of leftovers.

Another tip for grocery day:  group all similar items together before putting them away to save steps and time.   You’ll likely store and organize more items efficiently when put away together than stuffing one item at a time into, say, the freezer.

Put a tray under the pet dish to catch some of the spills and drips if it’s in the kitchen area.  Bow wow.  Meow.

Meal Preparation

Use disposable plastic gloves like those that restaurant workers use for meat preparation and messier food items.  Simply turn them inside out as you take them off and throw them away to keep everything sanitary.  This saves time and avoids the risk of contamination when trying to wash your sticky gooey hands!  Here’s a cheap alternative:  wrap a sandwich baggie around your hand and use that hand to hold the meat while the other hand holds the knife.  The baggie-method also works well for greasing cooking pans.

I learned from the Rachel Ray Show to keep a trash/scrap bowl (or one of the food wrappers) on the counter to collect all of the scraps; throw everything away at the end of your meal preparation, EXCEPT meat wrappings.  Julie tip:  for meat wrappings and containers, cut them open after placing the whole package inside a grocery store plastic bag.  The bag catches the juices and makes for an instant disposal container after the meat is removed.  This also reduces smell after it is in the trash can  so you don’t have to empty it as often.

Keep the kitchen trash can accessible during meal preparation to eliminate time/hassle opening a cabinet or pantry door repeatedly.  Heck, pull out the trash can and put it next to you until you are done generating trash then return it to the cabinet or pantry!  This also saves steps walking across the room and possibly outside of your “work triangle.”

Pile up all of the recyclable containers from meal preparation off to the side of your work triangle.  Take everything to the recycling bin at one time after you are done preparing the meal and pouring refreshments.  A similar strategy goes for composting fresh fruit and vegetable scraps; pile them up on one of the damp paper towels and throw the whole thang into the compost pile at the end of each day.  (I use plain white paper towels by the way.)

Try to minimize the number of spoons, spatulas etc. used on the stove during cooking.  Who says the spoon used to stir the sauce can’t stir the gluten-free noodles boiling in water?  Saves having to wash and handle extra utensils.

Use one sharp knife for meat and another one for everything else during food preparation at a given meal.  Simply toss the meat knife into the dishwasher after use.

Similarly, use one pan for successive cooking tasks where possible.  For example, the meat drippings on the foil lining the roasting pan from the chicken can make great flavoring for oven-roasted vegetables!  Another example:  re-use the pan in which you boiled the gluten-free pasta to steam the vegetables or make the gravy.  You probably don’t even need to wash it after draining the noodles!

Wash the dishes as you go or load them directly into the dishwasher to save clean-up time and stress after the meal.

Leaning against a chair, placing one foot on a stool or the bottom shelf of an open cabinet, or sitting on a step stool can all reduce fatigue and back strain during meal preparation.

Mealtime

Serve prepared foods buffet style, serving them in their cooking pots and pans on the stove and counter.  This keeps everything inside the “work triangle” and prevents having to wash extra serving dishes and transport items to/from the kitchen table.  This also makes it easier to manage different dietary needs and preferences of various family members.  For example, I can open the pouch of shredded cheese for those wanting a cheese topping on a salad and keep mine diary-free because I serve the salad without cheese in one main bowl.  Alternative:  make the salads in individual bowls and save washing a large serving bowl altogether.

Put specific items directly on the plate of the person headed through the “work triangle” buffet instead of in a separate dish.  For example, my husband likes tomatoes on his salad but I cannot have them at this time.  So I put the tomatoes on his plate or in his salad bowl and he serves himself from there.  The dishes are on the counter, by the way, as part of the buffet saving effort from having to “set the table.”

Ask a family member to take drink orders and pre-pour drinks before the meal where possible to reduce clutter and clean-up tasks.

Leftovers

Sometimes I put the whole, covered and slightly cooled saucepan or casserole dish in the frig after dinner, on a heat-proof silicone hot pad.  The next day it’s ready for re-heating.

Sometimes I pull out the lunch-sized storage containers before or after dinner and make my hubby’s lunch right away before storing the leftovers.

Often I’ve made extra servings of each dish to freeze individual portions in plastic containers or baggies after the meal.  The items can be stored as complete meals or separately in sandwich bags; the sandwich bags are then placed into 1-gallon freezer bags marked Meat, Veggies, Breads, or Fruit.  Talk about healthy fast food!

Storing meat portions has become a versatile helper in preparing future meals, especially when diets vary among family members.  I might even store meat-and-cheese burgers separately from meat burgers in respective gallon freezer bags labeled for each family member.  Love freezer bags!  This will save time in the future when you simply do not have the time to make enough food to meet everyone’s needs.  For example, on the night I am writing this, I’m glad I had a half of a cooked baked potato frozen that I could add to my husband’s meal:  I have been unable to grocery shop this past week and he needed more than the veggie and meat entrees that comprise my meal plan.

Summary

From meal preparation, mealtime, clean-up, and storing leftovers, you can see that I am all about saving time, energy, and moolaberries!  I do re-use the freezer bags most of the time by the way as long as they do not get soiled from the items stored in them!  If you would like some tips for managing special diets, head to an earlier blog post and I hope you’ll find something useful for you:  Extreme Diet Survival Strategies

Please feel free to share with me your tips and tricks, especially within the context of helping the homemaker with chronic illness.  Take care,  :J

To Hell and Back: Part 2

Continued from To Hell and Back:  Part 1
Back by Grace
I had caught a glimpse of hell on earth with the most violent seizure attacks that I had ever experienced in my life in the wee wee hours of the morning on July 5, 2013.  Our mini family reunion and gathering for a memorial service was shaping up to be a living nightmare with no end in sight; something like, “weeping, gnashing of teeth” were now my living hell as the Bible describes hell for those eternally separated from God.  But I have Jesus in my heart!  Nothing made sense.  Surely I felt as though I was dying.  I found myself asking:  where is God now?
The story continues.
It was inching closer to 6:00 a.m. EST on Friday, July 5th.  Since we were now in the CST zone, my husband, Steve, and I figured out between the ongoing attacks that we might be able to get a little sleep before the sun came up if these episodes would somehow stop.  But how?
The inner voice I have come to know as the Holy Spirit in times such as these suggested that I ask Steve get my industrial gas mask out of my suitcase.  He did, I strapped that baby on, and within 5 minutes the episodes had diminished in frequency, intensity and duration.  Just a low grade intermittent series of tic attacks remained and I started to be able to speak without eliciting further attacks.  Steve was already talking about packing up and going to a hotel immediately or even driving home tomorrow!  We doubted how we could possibly find the strength to do either option at this hour and what if I reacted to the hotel room?  Then what would I do?  Sleep in the car?  I wasn’t even sure it would be good for me to go to the car for awhile parked in front of my in-law’s because of the hot and humid weather of Arkansas:  perhaps I would suffocate in my sleep!
Then my waking prayer led me to suggest to Steve that he try to get some sleep and I would just lie there in bed for awhile until he was more rested.  I needed to trust that after some sleep Steve could lead us in what to do next and in the meantime the Lord would somehow sustain me.  I was a mess anyways so I should not be trusted to make any big decisions!  It was becoming difficult to breathe through the large respirator mask with my sore, constricted chest.  I was also getting very warm further aggravating all of the flared up noxious symptoms like the massive neck headache.  But I must wait anyways.  Neither one of us in no position to make a rational decision at this time.
Turns out that I was able to sleep about 2 hours.  I woke up feeling like my head was in a vice!  My chest tightness was actually reduced however, perhaps by breathing against the resistance of the respirator mask fitted to my face.  Wow, just like loosening a tight muscle through deep pressure, the intercostal muscles of my rib cage had relaxed enough to allow both breathing and sleep!  And somehow I was now fully awake.  I felt terrible but awake.  Then the next steps came to mind.
I gathered my purse, got dressed in my clothes from yesterday, grabbed some food and water from the kitchen and headed out to our car.  There was no time to worry about clean underwear and the latent UTI I was still battling.  Surely I would feel better after some nourishment as it usually had helped after past seizure attacks, so these would be my next steps.
The fresh air outside felt good.  It was considerably cooler and less humid than when we had arrived.  But geez (!) did it feel weird to be sitting in the passenger seat of a Dodge Magnum at daybreak, loaded with 21-foot and 19-foot surf skis on the roof!  How the heck could I remain inconspicuous in a fighter jet set up like that?  I saw the elderly neighbor next door walk outside to get his morning newspaper.  I’d been sitting there awhile, his house was for sale, and I was insanely curious about the listing information in the box in front of his house.  My how the delirious mind wanders!  But at that moment I just wanted to sink below the window line of the car door, if you know what I mean!
I must mention here that my husband’s family knows the story all too well of a really really close female family member suddenly leaving a family reunion with the family car sans family!  The father and his children were stranded several States away from home without transportation or monies to get home any other way.  Turns out that a couple family members helped them out and the dad rented a car for part of the trip.  Now here I am, relatively new to this family, suddenly disappearing from the bedroom, sitting in the “family car” with my set of car keys, and no one knows what is going to happen next!  I knew that I was not going to leave to go anywhere until someone in the household woke up, even if I knew that practically speaking, I could take time to find a hotel while everyone was sleeping.  But leaving a “ransom note” simply would not be enough to remove the reminder of the old wound.  Leaving would just hit “too close to home” if you know what I mean!  I had to stay put.
Then I noticed that the neighbor next store had come outside again, this time to take an early morning walk.  He was now talking to another neighbor just up the hilly, winding street.  Taking a walk was one option I had considered to kill time so I got out of the car.  The H.S. was working again and the idea came to ask the gentlemen about other hotels or rental properties within the community.  I knew that my mother-in-law’s house had been rented in the past.  Perhaps there are other homes like hers, maybe one with hardwood floors?
Turns out that the men were very friendly and helpful.  The retired Baptist preacher told me that a house across the street was was a rental and there was a sign with a phone number posted over the carport.  We walked over to the house and I copied down the phone number.  I thanked him as we finished chatting and returned to my fighter-jet home base to start making phone calls.
My dearest Steve walked up to the car about then to check on me.  I updated him on the information that I had just learned and said that I felt awake enough to start making phone calls.  He was still so exhausted that he needed to return to bed.  I didn’t see a problem with that and kissed him goodnight once again.  Before long my in-laws, my “other mom” and “other dad” as I call them, were up and checking on me as well.  With tears I shared what had happened (and would learn much later that night that they had heard me crying earlier and knew something was wrong).  I did not want them to feel bad as they had graciously opened their home to us to stay with them for the weekend.  Later I found out that they never got the Facebook message about my sensitivities!  Sigh.
Within a few minutes, my “other dad” and I were checking out the housing options that sounded suitable for me.  Over the next several hours I had done a sniff test at the local hotel, had another seizure attack and mostly recovered, toured one of three rental houses, rented one, stopped at the library, and returned back to their house to pack up the car.  By this time my Divinely-sustained energy on two hours of sleep was waning.  Like a damaged war plane on auto pilot, I eventually got to bed after some food, supplements, spit bath, etc. around 3 in the afternoon.
The townhouse rental worked out reasonably well as alternative housing.  I could prepare all of my special dietary foods without inconveniencing or even offending my “other mom.”  My in-laws’ provision of a place within the gated community of Hot Springs Village even gave my husband’s sister and husband a place to crash closer to family for two nights with us in their own suite.  Staying with us saved them hours of driving and increased our time to visit with them.  Sweet.  Unfortunately my time was cut short some by some more attacks (cause I’m still on Lyme antibiotics that flares up the attacks too) but it was still more time overall than we would have had if they were staying an hour away where their vacation had started.
Steve and I had some very sweet respite in that townhouse in Hot Springs Village.  We got to share our surf skiis with our family at one of the beautiful lakes nearby too.  If you read between the lines, this means that I got back in my surf ski kayak for the first time in a year!  For that, I am also grateful.  It felt great!
“To hell and back” is my sentiment for this past long weekend.  Going forward, my antibiotic regime is about to change to better address the UTI.  Perhaps I will tolerate the Levaquin better this time than in the past, for having endured the wretched side effects of the Doxycyline I’ve been on the past 2 weeks.  As the long weekend continued, I ended up reacting to environmental toxins in more places than my in-laws’ home and generally recovered o.k. after each. Gratefully, the reactions were in private, my preference.
So the Lyme and the Chronic Inflammatory Response Syndrome certainly did not take a vacation this Fourth of July holiday!  And yet I can’t help but see that having the attack and spending time with my “other dad” brought us closer together in a way that probably would not have happened if everything had gone  smoothly.  I saw a tenderness in him on Friday that I will cherish.   Steve and I have only been married five years.  Sometimes it takes a lifetime to have a connection like that with your “other dad” . . .
There’s a saying that I’ve quoted in this blog before that bears repeating here:  When going through hell, don’t stop!  Yup, that’s a funny one!  The take home message is this:  if you but do as scripture leads, with the guidance of the Holy Spirit in the name of Jesus Christ, our suffering (seizure attacks) will produce endurance (on 2 hours of sleep), our endurance will build character (to enjoy time with my father-in-law), and our character will produce hope (that our suffering will not be wasted).  I encourage you to mediate on Romans 5:4, where these themes are found in God’s Word.
When going through hell on earth do not stop.  The Lord is working and it will be for our own good and joy.  He promised for those who believe in Him (1 Peter 1:6-9) and in the end there can be great joy!
DSCF8633

To Hell and Back: Part 1

The Bible tells us that in hell there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.  There will be unquenchable fire, separation from the loving and gracious tri-une God and it will be forever.  And “forever” is a concept that is nearly impossible for us humans to understand since we live in a temporal, finite world where God is with us if we but reach out and call upon His name.

To me, hell sounds like unending misery at the highest level.  There will be no relief and eternal darkness in hell.  When physical and emotional trials push us beyond the breaking point in our lives, like the pain of an acute injury or death of a loved one, perhaps we may start to imagine what hell might be like.  Fortunately this level of anguish in our lives tends not to continue for the rest of our lives.  Often there is a measure of relief at some point.  When that relief comes we can also be grateful that the Lord is merciful, that joy may return if we but keep our eyes focused on Him.  While He promises that He will never give us more than we can handle, the only way to “handle” the acute level of misery is with Him.  Don’t we all say it no matter what our beliefs, “God help me!”  His presence in this life is a supernatural, mysterious phenomenon.  It is also an indwelling benefit (through the Holy Spirit) when we have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
My personal hell began in the wee hours of the morning on July 6, 2013.  My husband, Steve, and I had just driven 16 hours through the night from our home in Indiana to visit family in Hot Springs, Arkansas.  We had made 2 longer stops, some shorter stops, and were grateful to finally arrive at 5:00 a.m. EST.  We were also glad that his parents had made it from their primary residence in California to this second home just hours before us and had left the door open.  But when I stepped inside the door I sensed some mustiness and fragrances that might not go well with my Chronic Inflammatory Response Syndrome.  I had made an attempt to let them know my sensitivities before our trip but I guess it wasn’t sent through the proper channels in a timely and meaningful manner for them to act on the information.
I helped Steve unpack the car and did a quick scan around the house.  Yes, the carpet and fixtures were older and the place had remained vacant for most of the past year.  Someone was hired to keep it clean and that may have provided other issues from the chemically-laden cleaning solutions.  The bedspread and bed skirt were cute but appeared dusty so we removed both and put them in the closet.  I saw decorative aromatic sticks on a shelf in the bathroom with scented hand soap in a dispenser on the sink.  The mattress in the guest bedroom was uncovered and appeared older but we couldn’t do anything about all of that at that late hour.  I put our own clean sheet over the top sheet on the bed and Steve opened the windows.  Gratefully, the air was cooler overnight in this shady part of Hot Springs Village, Arkansas.  We prepared for bed and hoped for the best.  We were trashed from travelling for sure.
Within a few seconds the seizure attacks began.  Oh these weren’t the usual kind where my body shakes uncontrollably from my torso through my limbs, I can’t breathe, and I may or may not groan in discomfort as my head whips forward and backward or side-to-side.  This time the movement was so violent that my body was lifting up and down from the bed repeatedly!  The chest compression-like tightness was so bad that it restricted my breathing painfully so; I wondered if my heart was beating at all!  The violent attacks lasted about 20 seconds each and continued with a 30-90 second break in between each one.  I had no idea when the next one was coming!  I gasped to catch my breath.  Steve was in horror.  He had bad attacks before many times before but not this bad!
I could not speak, move, or do anything to help myself.  I held on for dear life.  Aware that my father and mother-in-law were sleeping in the next room, I struggled to keep from vocalizing during the episodes.  Finally anguish broke through and I could not stop myself from sobbing uncontrollably.  What a wretched episode to have to endure!
In my own strength, I developed a plan. I was feeling nauseous and vomiting appeared imminent. If I started vomiting, then I would blurt out through the seizure attacks for Steve to call an ambulance! So there. I had now identified what I considered to be the worse-case scenario and what we would do if it happened. With that in mind, I held on a little longer . . .
There was no indication that my living hell would ever stop.  I could not find a way out on my own.  I had caught a glimpse of hell on earth and it appeared that I was stuck there indefinitely.  Dear Lord, I’m coming home!
See, “To Hell and Back:  Back by Grace (Part 2)” for the conclusion of this blog post.

Kermit the Frog Here

Kermit

James 1 reminds me:

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

These words have guided me for years during many trials by fire and extreme life makeovers!  As I have said many times this past week:  “If I did not have my faith in Jesus Christ, I’d be lost.”

Wow.  That is a testimony of sorts I guess.  I give the Lord credit for the presence of mind to utter those words after seizure attacks during various health appointments and when communicating with non-believers on Lyme-specific Facebook pages.  I said it because it is true.

To God be the glory for the things He hath done in my life, for the good that may come.  I’m going to hang in there for, as Paul Harvey put it, “the rest of the story.”  Or better yet as the apostle Paul wrote when bound in chains in his letter to the Philippians:

being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Phil 1).

Now that’s a promise for which to hang in there, eh?  Turn to Jesus and He will carry you too!