Category: Recovery from Serious Illness: Lyme, CIRS, & More

Faith in Jesus is Critical

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Yeah so it’s the message I put on the metal template of my new jewelry.  Of course.  It’s not just a trend for me.  Faith in Jesus is critical to my survival these days!

I think I slept  2 hours, twice last night, awakened by demonic influences, seizure attacks, and a massive headache.   Somewhere in the middle of these 2 episodes of sleep, I pushed myself out of bed to eat, drink, and read . . . my husband’s Popular Mechanics magazine, of course!  Reading about the most innovative inventions of the past year is sport for a re-budding entrepreneur like me.  I love creativity in virtually all of its forms.  We all have creativity in us, I believe placed here by the Lord of all creation, the master Creator.  And somewhere in the middle of reading about these inventions I developed a theory about my seizure attacks (formerly known on this blog as “seizure-like tics.”)

:J
Here goes:  if I have seizure attacks when falling asleep and perhaps in a unique stage of the sleep cycle then can the attacks be caused by disease in the sleep center of the brain?  I have pulsing sensations behind my eyes at times, perhaps near the hypothalamus which is part of the brain’s sleep center.  If this dysfunction is localized I wonder if it is possible to use my Rife, Beam Ray machine to target the frequencies of these particular tissues?  Cautiously I may even consider medications or supplements (although I have already tried several of each!).  My brain MRI was normal so there’s no structural issue.  Hmmmmm.  Looking forward to my next appointment with my Lyme Literate Doctor; we have so much to discuss!

:J

The Lord gave me and you the ability to create.  The Lord gave me and you the ability to use our minds to solve problems, reason, remember, learn, and experience emotions.  These are called executive functioning skills.  We are unique from all animals and plants in this regard and with these gifts comes stewardship.  I will only ask the question for myself:  am I using what I have, where I am, with what abilities I’ve got?  Better said is as follows:

1 Peter 4:10-11

New King James Version (NKJV)

10 As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. 11 If anyone speaks, let him speak as the oracles of God. If anyone ministers, let him do it as with the ability which God supplies, that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belong the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen.

So I create.  I try to figure this Lyme stuff out.  I also wait on Him for answers, inspiration, healing, grace, mercy, everything.   In the middle of the night, when I can do nothing because of the wretchedness of Lyme Disease, I simply say the name, “Jesus.”  In the end, faith in Jesus is critical.

:J
Thank you Lord for increasing my faith.  Thank you Lord for meeting me in the middle of the night last night.  Thank you for the comfort and faith I can feel in the arms of my Steve.  I humbly submit to your will and purpose.  And if something good comes from this wretchedness, may You alone receive the glory.   In Christ’s name, Amen.

Great info. for those new to the topic of Lyme Disease

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Great Info. for those new to the topic of Lyme Disease

Click on the blue link above for an easy-to-understand article and link to the important and free movie, Under Our Skin.

Could be a helpful resource for sharing about the Lyme Disease  story with family and friends.  Thank you Dr. Mercola!

Sunday afternoons can be the hardest

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After my former spouse left me, I experienced what most would now call a “Extreme Life Makeover!”  Moving my residence 5 times, losing my home, the work injuries, the condo fire, feeling destitute, deaths in the family, oh my!, I could go on.  I won’t because every single trial was ordained by God to bring me to His throne of grace, to rely totally on Him, and to understand Him as my Heavenly Husband, Lord, and King.  The restoration that followed would blow your socks off if you knew me in 2003 and in 2012.  Many thought I would turn away from the Lord during those dark days.  Er, no, I became humbled, dependent on a worthy Savior. He sustained then restored me and for that I am grateful.

I am grateful that He has chosen to bless me in this season of my life.  Wow.  I thought I was going to write about how difficult Sunday afternoons were as a “separated” then “single” woman in her late forties, back then.  I thought I was going to vent the trouble I had this Sunday afternoon when I found myself very alone.  Er, no, guess not.

Isn’t blogging great?  You can talk yourself out of all kinds of things.  Barking with a purpose.

Take care all.  With love,  Julie

Me and my Lord

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Well soon it will be just me and my Lord here to navigate the varied waters of life for about a week.  Steve will be traveling and I feel:

Sad.  I long to get away and see friends and family too.

Hurt.  This journey of illness has gone on way too long at a level way too challenging.

Scared.  What if I can’t get out of bed and get what I need?

Worried.  Will I have enough good moments to get up and take care of myself?

Curious.  How will the Lord use this for His purposes, His glory, and to return as my Heavenly Husband as He did when I was single and in need just 6 years ago.

Trusting.  He has provided for me before in ways that actually exceeded my needs, in His good timing, with His good grace.

Loved.  My extended family was here earlier this week and poured out their love and affection right before facing this upcoming week alone.

Cared for.  My husband completed many house projects these past 2 days and 2 weekends, and trusts in the Lord and the good graces of others to be there for me when he cannot.  He was willing to reschedule this trip.  In the end, I decided to be brave.

Brave.  Heading into unknown waters once again usually strengthens me at some point.

Empty.  Breathing.  Living in the moment.  Open.  Ready.  Unwell.  Submitted.  Humble.  Expectant.  Filled with wonder.  Questioning.  Accepting.  And reminiscent of how these kinds of situations always had some sweetness in the past . . .

About six years ago I was very alone in my 3rd floor condo, unable to move due to excruciating back pain.  I was single and off from work due to an injury, then fired.  Workers’ Compensation was cut off and I had very little savings.  I did not know how I was going to make it through the next month or how I could possibly return to any type of work unless my back got better.  My mom was in another State, weakening from lung cancer.

It was Thanksgiving weekend and my mom had fallen and broken her pelvis the week before.  She would not be able to travel to see me nor I travel to see her.  My only surviving brother would be taking care of her at her home in Michigan.  I was living in the Chicago suburbs amongst millions of people yet very alone.  Most of my friends and my church was 45 minutes from my home.  No one would be coming to get me for Thanksgiving dinner since I couldn’t tolerate sitting in the car to make that trip either.  So I decided to do a juice fast to try to boost my capacity for healing and overall health.  Yeah, instead of gorging on food like everyone else does Thanksgiving day or shopping on Black Friday, I would be weak from vegetable juicing, citrus flushes, and herbal cleanses.  Might as well fast; I would be alone anyways and able to focus on the tasks at hand without interruption.

By Saturday night I was very weak.  I didn’t have a T.V. remote that worked so I lain on the floor on a mattress pad in front of the T.V. with only local channels.  There was nothing meaningful to watch and the worship CDs weren’t cutting it anymore.  In the quiet I did not know what to do.  I planned to re-introduce whole organic foods the next night yet was committed to making it one more day through the juice fast.  Sleep doesn’t come easy when you are hungry for real food!  I wondered if I should make some more juice?  Should I try to sleep?  Should I just stare at the ceiling some more?  My condo sure was pretty and for that I was grateful.  I talked to the Lord all night long.

I decided to channel surf one more time, looking for a sign or something of interest.  At 11:30 at night on a holiday weekend, maybe there would be something decent on the tube even at this hour.  So what do you think I found?  What would the Lord put on late night television just for me?  Would it be about turkey leftover recipes or worse and tempt me to break my fast?  How could anything console me in the middle of the night?  Well I found it on public television.  Right there on WGN:

A telethon fundraiser on colon cleansing!

What?  On a foodie holiday weekend?  Fundraising by promoting colon cleansing DVDs?  Yes!  Right there on public television was a show just for me.  Then they played it twice!  I watched both segments then went to bed.  I slept like a baby.  The next day I finished my fast and life went on, getting stronger every day.  Early in the new year I was offered a new job and by Thanksgiving of 2007, I would be moving to Indiana to marry my dreamy Steve.  Wow.

God is good.  All the time.  God is good.  Don’t believe it?  Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will guide your paths.

That’s Proverbs 3:5-6.  Believe in Him.  He is worthy of your trust and He cares for each of us, every detail of our lives.

Me and my Lord.  In the middle of the night in the year 2006 as it is right now in 2012.  In the daytime and always.  I love you Lord.  Thank you for everything.

A New Day, A New Moment

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This moment is the best one I have had in 4 days. Just wanted to share it with you! My Uncle Dave (from Brooklyn, Michigan) and my Aunt Lori (from Tarpon Springs, Florida) are coming to see me tomorrow. Very sweet. Praise the Lord and I’ll seeya later . . . so much to do. :J